Indepenence

This week I'm preparing for school. Ainsley will start Kindergarten and Ashden will start preschool. As you can imagine, I am feeling conflicting emotions. I will MISS them terribly throughout the day, but I won't miss the fighting and headache of grocery shopping with 3 kids and on and on. As I'm processing my emotions about it I have to remember that this is not about ME. It's their day, their new school year and really their gain of independence. As sad as I am, they are both really excited. We meet their teachers tonight and Ashden asked me a question that initiated this whole bog of thoughts... He said "So I'm going to go to Bertha Barber without you guys for the whole day?" My interpretation - he was asking if he was going to be there- alone- and when I answered yes, he said, "YES!!!" I was instantly feeling the rejection but then I remembered that's it's not about me. He is excited for his new independence, his new space, where it's just him and the BIG BIG world. As much as this scares me, I remember Dr. Dobson's book about the stages boys go through. They initially bond with momma of course, but then around age 3 they need to separate themselves and bond more to Daddy and his image. Well, this makes sense doesn't it. Daddy leaves everyday to go to work. Why wouldn't he be excited to leave as well? Off to back to school night- let's hope I save the water works for home.